Facetiouscreature's Blog

It has been years since Ambrosia has spoke about Tera to Sophia. It appears Sophia really is a true friend. She has kept the secret too. Ambrosia’s mother was wrong to say that Sophia could not be trusted. Sophia may appear wild to parents and schoolmasters, but she knew what was important to Ambrosia and kept the secret safe.

It was one of the rare journeys that took Ambrosia, her mother, and Tera to another village to show their horses. It must have been an important show because Ambrosia’s mother and Tera have been stressed out and arguing all day. Now that Ambrosia was older, she was free to roam the show. She would wander around and check out all the different horses until finally deciding that it was never as exciting as she’d hoped it would be and she heads back to her mother. Through the crowds of people she spots them; Tera and her mother with one of their horses-yelling and getting red in the face. Quickly, Ambrosia tries to figure out if she had done anything wrong. After concluding she had not, she continued on. As she reached her mother she overheard talk of Tera leaving and moving out. Confused she stepped back-had she heard this correctly? Tera was finally out of the house? It felt as if a ray of sunshine would burst out of her-she finally had a victory. She doesn’t know why or what they were fighting about-but Tera and his games were finally over. It was her time to come out of her shell. No more living in the shadows waiting to be found. No more mornings full of pain. No more Tera. From now on, it would be just Ambrosia and her mother.

After three years had passed, life would prove to be difficult for the two of them. Ambrosia’s mother now worked three jobs to support Ambrosia and their horses. They had to move to a smaller house, one in a nearby village. Ambrosia saw even less of her mother. She found ways to get by though-new friends, a job, and now she found that boys could keep her busy.

Ambrosia’s mother caught on to one of her crushes-Dustin. Dustin worked at a local merchant. Ambrosia’s mother would make random stops to the market to instigate a conversation between Ambrosia and Dustin. She fueled their interactions. Dustin was very polite and eventually the two started talking regularly. Although Ambrosia liked Dustin, she was cautious to let him get to know her. What if he found out about her secret? Would he make fun of her? Or worse, what if he asked questions? Dustin eventually asked Ambrosia out on a date for Thursday. They were to go to a show and then he would take her home. Ambrosia was so excited she told Sophia. Being the friend she was, Sophia wanted to get to know Dustin, and see how cute he was. Tickled at the thought that she may soon have a boyfriend that none of her friends new-Ambrosia let Sophia meet him. A few days later, Thursday to be exact, Dustin cancelled the date. Devastated, Ambrosia went to Sophia. Sophia explained that Dustin had told her that he felt Ambrosia was too shy. So, her loss of trust in others has destroyed a potential relationship. So much for stepping out of her shell. She thought she had been doing so well. Dustin seemed to like her, but proved that to be a lie. This gave Ambrosia more reason to guard herself from others. It also frustrated her the more she thought about it. Holding onto these secrets from the past can’t be helping. She decided she would tell her mother about her events with Tera. Throughout the years, as Ambrosia improved in school, she had learned that what happened between she and Tera was more Tera’s fault than her own. She was young and naive to his manipulations and abuse. Surely her mother would not get angry at her.

That evening when her mother came home, Ambrosia awkwardly had a conversation with her. She said to her mother “I want to tell you something.” Her mother stopped and listened. This was a good start. Ambrosia explained that Tera had abused her when he lived with them. Almost unfazed, her mother asked what she wanted her to do. Ambrosia said “Nothing, it’s over. I just thought you should know.” Feeling a little better about telling her secret, Ambrosia went about her way. That seemed easy enough. The days passed and it was if Ambrosia had never said anything at all. Everything was normal. Too normal. Ambrosia began to wonder if that callous response from her mother was the right response. Or the response she had been looking for. Her mother didn’t seem to question it or be stunned at all. It could have been worse, her mother could have been angry. “Oh well” she thought, at least she can try to move on. Leap forward into the life she’d been missing out on. Shedding the secrets of her past.

Ambrosia grew up quick. Not big and strong, but emotionally mature. She learned to defend herself and learn about others from a distance. She couldn’t just trust people anymore. Not after years of Tera’s mind games. It always seemed like there was a trap-and Ambrosia was always falling into it. He would take what she wanted most and use it against her. When she got wise to that, he would get angry, and that would make her fall in line again. You are supposed to respect adults.

Ambrosia started her own secret life-one she could control. One where she could gather some answers. If her mother wanted her to spend time with Tera-she would certainly do that. On her own terms. When she was in control she’d get answers. When a young girl wants answers, she’ll find a way to get them.

Each night Ambrosia would ask her mother to sleep with her-and each morning she would have to ask why she never came to bed. Her mother would always tell her there just wasn’t enough room with Ambrosia and Tera already in bed. Ambrosia began to wonder if it was Tera’s plan to beat her mother to bed. She decided to keep trying her experiment for a bit. On several occasions, Ambrosia would wake to the shaking or force of the bed moving. Sometimes she would fidget and Tera would retreat, but other times Ambrosia still entered into her day full of pain. After two or three years, Ambrosia became a very deep sleeper. Almost as if a part of her didn’t want to be aware of the reality she lived.

One day at school Ambrosia’s schoolmaster brought some soldiers in to speak to the children. While they were there they talked of how children have boundaries just like adults and how adults need to respect these boundaries. Ambrosia, although young, found it strange that soldiers were talking about such things. As she listened to them they said things like “no one should ever touch you in a way that makes you uncomfortable” and “if someone, even your parents, doesn’t respect your boundaries you need to tell someone and get help”. Ambrosia perked up. They couldn’t be talking to her specifically, could they? That would mean that her secret had been found out. It all made sense, why else did her teacher have the soldiers come and talk about this. Perhaps Ambrosia should say something. Speak up now. They were there to help anyway. What if that would get Tera into trouble? Or her mom? What if Ambrosia is to blame for this? After all-she liked the games. They made her laugh. Again she decided to keep it to herself.

On the way home from school, Ambrosia’s best friend, Sophia talked about the soldiers and their discussion. She asked Ambrosia if she thought any one’s parents were doing bad things. Ambrosia said “NO, why? Do you?” Sophia didn’t know about Tera and the things he would do to Ambrosia. She never told Sophia. Sophia mentioned that maybe Heidi’s dad did that stuff because Sophia thought he was gross. Ambrosia didn’t think so. Sophia kept talking about it. Then she asked if Tera ever did anything to Ambrosia. Ambrosia got embarrassed and angry. How was everyone figuring this out? She must look different from everyone? It seemed like the whole world knew what was happening to her. She thought about telling Sophia-but instead acted like she never heard the question.

Later that evening while playing at Sophia’s house-Ambrosia broke her silence. She pleaded with Sophia to not say anything. It had to remain their secret. IF she ever told, Ambrosia would never be friends with Sophia again.

In the land of Moribund there is a young girl. She is very timid. She never gets into trouble, yet she is very brave among the few friends she has. Her name is Ambrosia. Ambrosia is sweet and always afraid to do wrong. The thing she wants most is the love, attention, and affection from her mother. Her mother is always busy. Ambrosia knows quite well that her mother loves her-that is why she must work very long hours and some times she even works several jobs. Even when her mother comes home, she is never really there. She is preoccupied with grown-up matters-so Ambrosia is left to tend to herself.
Well…..that is almost how it is.
You see, Ambrosia’s mother has invited a man to stay with them. He’s been there as long as Ambrosia can remember. His name is Terance. Ambrosia’s mother is very devoted to this man-although Ambrosia never sees them hug or kiss, she knows her mother loves Terance. Terance is not Ambrosia’s father but she knows to respect him as if he were and that he loves her as a father should. She has never met her real father, but feels that Terance is just like the dads her friends have-but she is still told to call him “Uncle Tera.”
Tera would tend to Ambrosia when her mother could not. He was always the first to offer to take her out of the village for journeys to other villages to show off their horses. This would allow Ambrosia’s mother to work longer hours and extra days for her masters. Ambrosia loved the journeys away from home. It was like the stories her friends would tell of family vacations, except she only got to vacation to other villages, and without her mother. For years Ambrosia would be alone with Tera. He would always watch her, take care of her when she was sick-give her medicine-and slept with her every night. This would make Ambrosia very happy. She finally would get the attention she was looking for.
Over the years, as she woke each morning, Ambrosia would be in pain. Unable to figure it out herself, she decided to wait for her mother one night. Her mother came home exhausted, but Ambrosia felt it was important to talk to her mother about the pains she’s been dealing with. Her mother explained that these were probably growing pains. Young girls tend to get pain in these areas when they get older-it’s how they turn into young ladies. This made Ambrosia feel better–she was only becoming a lady. There was nothing wrong after all. Since she had her mothers attention, Ambrosia asked her mother if she could sleep with her tonight. Her mother said “Yes, if there’s room tonight.” Excited, Ambrosia pranced to her mother’s bed and was greeted by Tera as usual. He was resting as usual. So pleased to have a “family” moment-sleeping with a mother and a “father” she crawled into her usual  spot next to Tera on the bed.Tera asked if she wanted to play their game. Delighted, she accepted the invitation. These games made her laugh. He shakes the bed like an earthquake is happening. Of course Ambrosia has to hold on to him, she didn’t want to fall. So he moved her to her usual position-laying on top of him. She held on and the game began. He shakes, she laughs. He shakes and she laughs. She laughs until the game has to stop because he tells her “there’s stuff coming out-let’s clean it up.” Ambrosia lays next to him, tired now. Mother should be coming into bed soon. She prays that mother will have room tonight.
The bed beneath her begins to move slowly-as if someone is moving closer. This awakens Ambrosia. She must have fallen asleep waiting for her mother. At the same moment she realizes that Tera is the force moving closer to her. Mother is nowhere in the room. She pretends to sleep. He moves slow-her heart beats strange. Why does he move like that? He moves with a purpose. He continues on-slowly he begins to put his hands up her pajamas. Startled, she fidgets and rolls over, away from him. This seems to be enough to stop his efforts. What was he doing? Again she drifts to sleep. Another day comes and the pain is worse today. Ambrosia starts to ponder if her pains are a result of Tera. That’s probably not it. He loves her. Maybe, she thinks, she should tell her mother about last nights events. Her mother would probably think she’s lying. Just looking for attention. So at last, she decides to keep it to herself. And for a few more years—-she does….

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